What is Family Mediation or Mediation in Divorce?

Family Mediation is not about reconciliation, getting back together or even being friends. The purpose of mediation is to help you to resolve problems that arise if you are separating or getting a divorce. Mediation provides a neutral environment which enables couples to control the decision making process which is facilitated by the Mediator, to reach more desirable outcomes.

Is Family Mediation cheaper than using Divorce Solicitors/going to Court?

Each case is different depending on the complexity. As a comparison, the average case per person using mediation is approximately £1,200 per person versus using Divorce Solicitors and going to Court which is on average £5,000 – £7,000 per person. All solicitors will be happy to give an indication of likely cost, the earlier you settle the matter the more costs you will save.

Is Family Mediation the same as therapy or counselling?

No it is not. We respect the fact that your relationship is at an end.
The purpose of Family Mediation is to resolve those problems that arise due parties separating.

How quick is Family Mediation?

Mediation is far quicker than using the family courts. Importantly you have control as to when the sessions are. We go at your speed and therefore you dictate how quickly matters proceed. If you choose to have a session once a week it will be quicker than once a month.

Is Family Mediation purely for couples that are divorcing or separating?

Family Mediation is available for anyone involved with the family. It may be a grandparent, step-grandparent, an aunt/ uncle or step-parent, to give a few examples.

I am not sure what assets I have?

We will guide you to identify the assets. We will use the same guidelines that the Family Courts use. Unless you and your ex-partner wish to use a different process, we will encourage and aid you to gather exactly the same information that you would need to gather for financial settlement using the Family Court process. This ensures that you can be sure that your decisions are based on good information.

How many session of Family Mediation are required?

This will depend on the what the issues are and how complicated those issues are. We would recommend that you budget for at least 3 sessions for straight forward matters and at least 5 sessions for financial matters.

How much will it cost?

Cost will depend on the pace of the mediation and number of sessions that are required.

When mediation is concluded, we reduce the proposals to writing. This will be an additional cost and you will be given a quote for this extra work.

What issues are suitable for Mediation?

The beauty of Mediation is that there is no boundaries, if you have an issue it is capable of being mediated. Some examples of issues that you may experience that can be dealt within mediation.

  • Time spent with natural children, step children or grandchildren.
  • One parent or their partner has to move, this will mean that it will be more difficult for our child /children to see the other parent.
  • You cannot agree which school your child should go to.
  • Do I have to leave the family home now or later?
  • Who will pay the joint debts?
  • I left the family home and now wish my share to purchase a small property.
  • I purchased a flat with my partner, my parents paid the deposit, will they get their money back?
  • What will happen to the children’s savings?
  • My ex partner has a new family, what will happen to maintenance I pay?
  • I have a new partner, I would like the children to have the same surname.
  • I have a partner who is from another country, if we have children where will we live?

This list is just to give you an idea of what can be discussed and solutions found through mediation.

What if my case is too complicated for Mediation?

No case is too complicated to be settled using mediation. Frequently the parties in mediation consult with outside experts such as accountants, appraisers, financial planners and solicitors during the process.

Are children involved in Family Mediation?

The expectation is that the parents make the decisions for the child’s/children’s welfare. We offer a service called Direct Child Consultancy please see the Direct Child Consultation page.

If I have a Divorce Solicitor, can I still use Family Mediation?

Yes and it is beneficial that you have a divorce lawyer who will be able to advise you about your rights and what the Family Courts may or may not do. You can use this information to inform your decisions during the Mediation.

I do not have a Divorce Solicitor, can I still go to Family Mediation?

You do not need a divorce solicitor to attend Family Mediation however as mediators we cannot give you advice.

Proceedings have commenced, can I still go to Family Mediation?

You can attend Mediation at any time. If you wish to attend Mediation, the Family Courts should be sympathetic and adjourn a case for this purpose.

If I go to Family Mediation, can I still go to Court?

Mediation can occur alongside court proceedings. If for any reason your Mediation is not successful, then you still have the right to use the Family Court system to resolve your issues.

I was divorced / separated years ago, can I still go to Family Mediation?

Mediation is available even if you separated/divorced years ago but are having on-going problems.

We Don’t Get Along Well – How Can We Possibly Mediate?

Getting divorced or separated can be a highly emotional time in ones life and often couples are overwhelmed and feel that they will be unable to negotiate face to face. Mediators are trained in helping couples who have high emotions but would still like to work things out as amicably as possible. It is our experience that couples do calm down and become effective mediation participants when they see that the process can work without adding to the high emotional and financial cost of divorce.

Do I have to sit in the same room as my ex?

Successful mediation is more likely to occur if you can sit in the same room as your ex-partner. However if you feel that you are unable to do this, separate rooms can be offered. Mediation is voluntary and if at any time it is too over whelming, you can bring the session to an end.

Will I have a fair say?

Each party will have an equal opportunity to express themselves and will be encouraged to play an active role in the decision making process.

I am afraid that my ex-partner will dominate me?

Mediation is completely voluntary. No-one should place pressure or force you to use mediation. It is the Mediators role to provide you with an environment that is comfortable and safe and ensure the necessary support to allow a fair and equitable discussion to occur. If you wish to speak, you will be able to. We ask everyone in the room to be respectful. Should the situation reach a point whereby the Mediator deems that either party is being abusive or that safety is being compromised, they will bring the session to an end. You are also empowered to bring the session to an end if it is too overwhelming for you.

Can what I say in Mediation be used in court?

Any matters discussed during the mediation process are confidential save for a few circumstances limited circumstances that will be explained to you before mediation commences.

Will our Agreement be Enforceable?

Your joint proposal will be put into a document called a Memorandum of Understanding. Upon both of you agreeing and signing the M.O.U, you can apply to the court for the proposals to be made into order. Once it is an order of the court it will be enforceable by the courts.

Mediation vs Litigation

Mediation vs Litigation